Singing in the Rain

One of my biggest fears (aside from roaches and heights) is singing where other people can hear me. I used to do it a lot and I think I'm alright at it... I mean the few people who have heard me sing in the last 10 years or so have told him I'm good. I'm just as freaked out to sing as I could be though.

I was singing in the car on a road trip a few weeks ago to God. I felt like He said to me (btw, I do believe God speaks directly to us as you'll no doubt catch in many of my blogs), "I love hearing you sing... why don't you do it more often?" I replied, "I'm just scared. I can't do it." He said, "But I gave you a voice to sing with... you should use it to glorify me." I sassed back, "Ok, I'll make you a deal (as if I could bargain with God... like we're equals), if you give me a guitar I'll learn to play guitar and I'll sing to you for whoever you want to hear." I kept singing in the car and didn't think much more about that conversation.

Weeks later, I was telling my room mate the story about me telling God to give me a guitar so that I could sing. I can't remember why it was brought up, but for some reason I was talking about it. After I told her the story she enthusiastically stated, "Oh! My parents are coming from Ohio in a week or two and they are planning on bringing my guitar with them! You may use it whenever you like!" My heart fell right down into my stomach. I didn't know if I was more excited that God provided, terrified of having sing for people, overwhelmed by the idea of learning to play an instrument, or all of the above.

It has been over two weeks and I still haven't made the time to learn to play the guitar. I feel a little guilty about it. I did promise God after all.

I have however made progress in the rhelm of singing and I have a fun idea.

I love secular music! (If you aren't up on the christian jargon, secular music is just any music that isn't Christian music). I love Lady Gaga especially! Even though I usually stop myself after singing a few lines and think, "Wait... I want to take a ride on your what?!" or "Ok so I have to choose between wanting love or fame if I want to play the love game?" Basically I'm always analyizing the lyrics and end up dissapointed because I don't agree with them. I've found a fix to this delimna though!

I have rewritten some of my favorite secular songs and now they are songs that glorify God!

My next challenge to overcoming my fear of singing is to make a Youtube post (eeee!!). I have redone Lady Gaga's Bad Romance song and intend to record myself singing my rendition and then I'll post it online (cause I don't have the guts yet to sing it any where else).

We'll see how that goes, wish me luck! (or pray for a little extra dose of God's grace or confidence or something along those lines.)