If I've told you what I am getting my degree in, there's a good chance I add, "…it's the most useless information I could imagine committing my time to." or "I don't agree with half the stuff they teach us."
Several times over the last month, I've wondered to myself, "Why do you invest so much time and energy getting educated if you don't agree with most of the stuff they teach? How can you change either your own perception or the world's perception about all the stuff you don't agree? Why do other people believe all this shit?" Those are things I think.
Well, for starters, I commit my time, money, and energy to pursuing a degree in psychology because I want to be a licensed counselor and you have to have an education to do that. I love people! I want to help them and I want to walk with them in our mutual pursuit of truth... God's truth.
I believe that a lot of people do psychological research because they are interested in identifying and explaining the human psych and ultimately understand and progress in our development as people. The problem though, is so many "conclusions" we have come to within the field of research have not been used for the sake of development and progression.
Let me explain:
A lot of the "answers" we use (at least from this undergrad student's point of view) are used to justify behavior or beliefs rather than progress. I believe a lot of people use research so that they have an excuse for their believe systems and their choices.
Every day I read for hours about psychology. I’m in 5 psych classes, so I’m constantly reading about it and constantly disagreeing.
Today’s reading was in my Choices in Sexuality (third edition) book by Susan McCammon and David Knox. This particular passage is discussing natural selection and whether morals/goodness/correct decision making in regards to sexuality is genetically inherited or not. The passage illustrates it’s point that we can learn to “cope” with our genetically inherited traits and uses rapists as an example. I read:
It means only that the trait is correlated with success in gene propagation…he suggested that evolutionary data could be used in the development of a high school rape prevention program. His proposed course would advise young men that their genetic heritage could engage in a spectrum of coercive activities…our now partially education young men would be informed that they need not permit their evolved psyches, which are after all working on behalf of their genes, to lead them into actions that could cause others such unhappiness” (pp. 212-213). He would explain that the extreme distress of rape victim is also naturally selected to keep a woman’s social partner from abandoning her. Young men and women, with a more accurate knowledge of human nature, could choose to behave adaptively in interpersonal or social, instead of evolutionary, terms. (Pg. 28)
Ok, so most of you know that I am a Christian and here’s a heads up, I’m about to get all Christian up in heya.
Let’s say for just a moment, that God was in charge of creating us. When God created us, let’s just imagine that maybe He loved us so much that he wanted to actually have a two way relationship with us… so he gave us this ability to make our own decisions. We chose to disobey one of His commandments to us and sin (choosing against God’s will) was birthed in all humanity.
Now that we’ve got the basics, let’s just say that maybe the choice to rape someone isn’t a genetically uncontrollable choice that we are just victims to… let’s say that it’s rooted in this little thing called pride and selfishness. Maybe, just maybe, someone could be so prideful (aka thinking so highly of themselves) that they only think of themselves and end up causing harm to another (in this example, rape).
I hate the idea of a school program targeting young men telling them that they are predisposition to raping a woman and then trying to teach them how to “cope” with the potential “predispositioned” problem (aka sin) they might face. I seem to remember a verse in the Bible that says:
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
And one of my very favorites says, “7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7)
Call me crazy, but I’d like to see an education program teach young men that they have been created by a an all loving warrior God of the universe and that they are called to reflect His nature by exercising a passion to pursuing and loving the heart of their King. When you love God, you forsake different ways of life that may have been tempting before. When you love God and have a relationship with Him, you are suddenly transformed and your heart’s direction changes course. You become more like God and you desire His desires (which don’t ever include rape).
Now let’s address the other half of this insanity. The quote above suggests and implies that women don’t enjoy being raped because a rapist won’t be the type of partner who will provide for their needs…
…Ok…
Haha I’m laughing at loud because I think all of this is just shit.
Really though... I’ve been raped. I’ve also been in love. Now when I compare the two experiences and think about the man I was completely in love with raping me, I still don’t think I’d be all that into it even if he gave me a check afterwards (or any kind of provision whether it be tangible, emotional, relational, physical, you name it). I just don’t think I’d be all that committed to him in my heart if he was raping me (call me crazy).
Now on the flip side, I think about the guy who raped me. That whole experience lacked any intimacy. It was purely physical. If you buy into the whole natural selection hurrah than don’t you kind of believe that the strongest genes survive and that our species is programed to populate? Don’t you believe that the point of sex isn’t for the purpose of intimacy and relational enhancement between a husband and wife but rather for the purpose of insuring that your genes will multiply? If you believe all that than you (and unfortunately far to little Christians today) certainly couldn’t believe that God may have also created sex to be a form of worship to be enjoyed by a husband and a wife… possibly a way to glorify God by loving and delighting in each other?!
Now I know there are all kinds of directions we can go from here argument wise (we talk nonstop for over 2 weeks if we wanted to about this one). But the article above suggested that humanity as a whole would want to prevent or discourage rape. The whole point of implementing an educational program would be to discourage the tendencies that men may have to rape women. Yes, from a natural selection view point, this could be because we don’t want the “rape” gene to survive. For the purpose of my argument though, let’s suppose it’s a “sin” gene that everyone except their dogs have and that it’s unavoidable and unmanageable unless you acknowledge a higher power (call me crazy, but is that a little easier to believe and accept than all this genetic stuff? People just don’t want to believe it cause it forces them to give up things that the sin nature seeks out – it’s called dying to yourself when you start acknowledging all that… and yes, it hurts and feels like dying but there’s a great trade off).
If we were to admit that we may have a sin problem on our hands, than we have to acknowledge that WE are the problem (not our genes)… and it puts the ball back in our court. Suddenly we can’t just say, “I raped someone, but I can’t help it, it’s in my genes.” We have to say, “I raped someone and I’m guilty and I’m in need of forgiveness!! I’m a hopeless case with a desperate need for mercy from all mighty, all powerful, and all loving God who has a desire to forgive my sin even though I can never pay Him back for it.” Now that’s scary...
I mean, what if God changes his mind about you? What if God makes an exception and says, “No, I’m tired of dealing with your imperfection and your inability to live up to my standards. You’re out. I’m perfect, I’m God, I set the standard, and sorry Courtney, you just won’t make the cut.” I mean, He’s God… if He wanted to, He could.
But check it, God says, 11 This is a trustworthy saying:
If we die with him,
we will also live with him.
12 If we endure hardship,
we will reign with him.
If we deny him,
he will deny us.
13 If we are unfaithful,
he remains faithful,
for he cannot deny who he is.
(2 Timothy 2:11-13)
Now this is where the faith part comes in. We can live in fear of God because we will never be perfect like He is, or we can live in the believe and the hope that even though God is holy and pure and perfect, He will still love us and remain faithful to us! Talk about a mental hurdle! That is terrifying! But for me, and I hope for you, it’s so freeing!
When I read that quote and think about women not being predispotioned to enjoy or accept rape because their partners are likely to not stick around and provide, I’m heart broken. Rape is a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual violation against another human (and yes, men can be raped so this isn’t simply a woman thing). I’m so heartbroken to think that some researcher could study our spirits down to a scientific formula and then say that is all we are composed of.
My room mate Tiffany Bixell was telling me about an analogy that a friend of hers shared with her. She was saying (and I won’t be able to type it as eloquently as she spoke it to me) that scientists use dissection as a way to study the body and understand how it works. They can take it apart, see how it’s put together, examine the passage ways, watch the body function as it dies (in many labs, they can cut an animal under sedation open and observe the living body function)… but ultimately, they have to kill the body to study it through dissection.
The reason I hate what psychology is capable of doing is because the science of studying the mind, heart, and soul boils the mystery and complexity of humanity down into a “scientific equation” rooted in statistics and formulas.
Something inside of my heart longs to scream, “I am not a statistic! I am not a formula! I cannot be explained and understood through lab based results! I cannot be comprehended solely in the context of science! I am fearfully and wonderfully made! And I am secure not because I fully understand what it means to be a human or a woman or an American or a student or a single person or a married person or a whatever. I’m secure because I was created by a God who is greater than me and who IS THE ULTIMATE TRUTH. I’m secure because as I learn, discover, and generate new ideas, I have an ultimate truth to verify hypotheses against that will rise above statistics and general populations! I’m free to be secure despite not having all the answers because I know that there is an ultimate truth and an intelligent design! I’m secure because I’m a child of God and because He loves me and will never reject me, even though science ultimately will if that’s all I put my faith in.”
See, I am all about discovering the complexity of humanity! I love learning about how we have been created because I believe with everything I am that as we discover ourselves, we discover more about God. I’m not in favor of using the research to justify our sin or to counter God’s commandments that were intended to build us up and give us lives full of hope and vigor. I am passionate for truth, and when I read my psych books, I’m constantly reminded of a world that is lost and directionless. I’m reminded of the weighty void in people’s hearts and their desperate longing to fill the void with answers. I long for people to see and know my God, my Love, my Truth!
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