My Admissions Letter to TAMU

Courtney Reed

Admissions Paper

UIN:

August 28, 2009

I believe that in order to fully develop character, integrity, compassion and love for others, a person must be stretched and grown through experiences and trials. I have been tested and pushed past limits that I did not know I had, many times throughout my life. And because of God’s love and grace, I have used the pain and battles as stepping stones to becoming the person I have wanted to be.

            Throughout elementary school, I battled severe depression. By my fourth grade year, I had been diagnosed with ADD, ADHD, Bipolar disorder, Seasonal depression, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I had ups and downs socially and never got very involved in school or with friends. My passion was horses!

            I began riding horses as a form of therapy to help deal with my depression. It was my escape. Art, music, animals, and the outdoors gave me the sense of accomplishment and responsibility that I craved and the structure that I desperately needed.

            Eventually, my depression and mood swings spiraled out of control. I was a danger to myself and others, so at the age of fourteen, I went away to a long term treatment center in Provo , Utah . It was in Utah that I received the treatment needed to save my life. My family was extremely supportive, and for the first time, I developed a personal relationship with Christ.

            In Utah , I excelled in my therapy, made friends, developed a positive self esteem, and realized, “I can do all things through [Christ] who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13. I felt invincible the day I graduated from my program with the highest achievable level. I was so proud. Unfortunately, pride always goes before the fall. 

            Two weeks after coming home, Mom left Dad without warning. My world, my hope, and my heart were crushed. The dream of being the cute high school cheerleader who makes good grades, has the warm cozy home, and the hot quarter back boyfriend was quickly replaced by anti social behavior, failed classes, a run down apartment, and no hope for anything more.

I quickly fell into the wrong the crowd and my heart became hardened by anger. I hated my circumstances and myself so much. I began skipping school constantly and hanging out with a really rough crowd. I saw how much it hurt my family and the people who loved me, but I didn’t care. For six months, I dove deeper and deeper into a lifestyle of sex and lies. I gained 90 lbs over the course of that year.

            Finally, my Dad intervened. He reminded me that God has called us to a higher purpose and that nothing can ever separate me from God’s love or his love. My heart was pierced by the words he spoke to me and a new hope for the life that I have dreamed of was ignited once more. We moved to Scottsdale , Az in order to start over.

            Starting over wasn’t as easy as it sounds. My old pattern of behavior crept into our moving van. Nearly a year later, I came home one night after sneaking out with a guy I barely knew. I remember looking at my runny make up in the bathroom mirror, and realizing what I had become. I stared at myself and wondered how a girl like me could turn into the type of girl I had always felt sorry for and looked down on. In that moment I realized that if I didn’t make huge changes, I would never have an education, a man who really loves me, I’d never be the mother I wish I had, and I’d be giving up. I was at a fork in the road of life. I was faced to choose between life and death. I put a star on that November 4, 2004 day on my calendar and prayed, “God I can’t promise I’ll be any different tomorrow, in fact, I am not sure I even want to be. I know you see how miserable I am and if anyone could change me you can! If you want me, take me.” And he did.

            One day turned into a week, then a month, then a year. I rekindled my relationship with Christ, met friends, lost 80 lbs, and I got involved in school and church. At age 17 I moved to Tulsa , Ok to live with a family friend named Ali. Ali became like a mother to me over the next two years. It was very difficult to be apart from my Dad, but I grew so much during that time. I learned to love my real Mom again and I forgave her for leaving and for her abusive behavior. I completely took myself off all medication for the bipolar and depression (and learned to fully use my coping skills – I’ve been successfully off meds for over 4 years). I also started dating, fell in love with God, and got a GED. After a year in the restaurant and retail industry, I decided college is definitely up my ally!

            During the last two years, I have moved around some and traveled a lot! I tried attending Liberty University in Lynchburg , Va for a semester, but quickly realized that Texas A&M is where I desperately want to graduate from.

             My dream is to start a treatment center for women where they will have a chance

to experience physical, emotional, and spiritual healing while discovering, refining, and pursuing their passions in the process. I want to use art, music, and lots of animals in the program too. I want my own life to stand as a model for people without hope, who don’t think they can be happy and healthy because I have seen God’s power in the lives of the hopeless. I want them to see that anything is possible, if they are willing to work hard, trust God, and keep moving forward.

In order to do this, I have chosen to seek a double degree Psychology. Eventually I will seek a Masters in Counseling followed by a PHD in Psychology. My heart is so passionate about sharing the good news about what God has done in my life, and what He can do in everyone’s life if they open themselves to Him.

A&M has my heart; please allow it to educate my mind! I remember visiting my sister (who is also apply for spring ’10) and seeing the monument. Just walking around campus and watching the Corps do drills was so interesting! Learning about all of the traditions fascinated me! Over the last month, I have become an employee at the West Campus Library and computer lab. I bike to work from my house simply because I love being on campus so much! The community and unity that unites the Aggies is something I long to be a part of for the rest of my life.

            Hopefully, my story has given you a better idea of who I am and encouraged you because, “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.” Matthew 17:20

            Nothing would make more proud then to proudly wear the Aggie ring and graduate with my psychology degree. God bless, Gig ‘Em Ags and Beat the HELL out of Texas !